BrideGroom indeed?!

On the wedding day or shortly before the wedding, the man is called the bridegroom and this is not without its reasons.

Take that word apart and it becomes pretty obvious; he's meant to be the bride-GROOM. That's not just a...ceremonial designation no, it's actually a job description. The job of the man is to 'groom' his woman. It subtly connotes an agriculture-inclined activity: to tend, to care for, to help improve, to supply essentials for growth and to bring out the best. The husband is not meant to bear the title 'bridegroom' just the wedding day (and night) alone rather, that is what/who he should be for the rest of his life! He should never stop tending, developing, nurturing and inspiring his bride to the fullness of her potentials.

So young Man, before you start 'delivering your manifesto', take a good look at your toolbox and ask yourself 'is my 'grooming kit' complete?"
"What exactly do I have to offer beyond material things?"
"Am I prepared to 'groom' this 'vine' or am I just craving its fruits?"

And my dear young lady, before you get carried away with whatever you're seeing or receiving, ask yourself: "does he have what it takes to help me become a BETTER PERSON?".
(Note the question: it's not just if he can give you better THINGS but if he can help you be a better PERSON).

What is his effect on your PERSON thus far? Are you becoming a better woman because of your association with him? Is there more clarity in your life? More discipline? More kindness? A better walk with God?

I once had a friend who during her birthday party, talked about how others had impacted her life and when she got to me, she couldn't place what impact I'd had on her. Silly as it may sound, it only left me with two options: I either cut off that friendship or start working towards being a positive influence on her.

Whatever the case, whether in a romantic relationship, a close or casual friendship, evaluate the influence ratio today and act in a fast but wise manner!!!

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PORT FROM THAT RELATIONSHIP!!!

You must have seen or heard of the new MTN Port advert and you also recall that the character “Saka” was a prominent face in Etisalat adverts before now? With a focus on relationships, I will be sharing with you some lessons from this Brand War or Brand Scandal and how they apply to today’s relationships.

Saka’s decision to port to MTN after a reported 20million naira deal reminds me of the story of a friend who had been dating a guy for 7 years and the guy kept avoiding the issue of marriage though he is well established. This is a clear example of what exists between single men and single ladies who date each other for years but the guy refuses to talk about, talk more of sealing the relationship with a marriage contract. ‘Saka’ had a relationship with Etisalat for years,  building and maintaining Etisalat’s brand values yet, not having any legal contract to assure him of his future. Today they have, and are still paying heavily for it. How does this concern you? Have you as a man/woman been dating someone for years with no future in sight? Does he/she change the topic when you discuss formalities of your relationship? Does your relationship have a goal in sight? If NO, then my dear friend, kindly PORT TO THE BETTER NETWORK! *Winks*.

My sincere advice to our single ladies is, don't be foolish. Look for a man that values you enough to keep you for life. Was Saka valued? If yes, did Etisalat take steps to protect that value? NO. Stay away from that guy that doesn’t talk of your future together. Even if he does and is not taking practicable and rational steps, stay away from him or advise him on what to do so as not to lose you! Though arguable, I believe marriage has nothing to do with being wealthy. Pastor Nike Adeyemi once shared how they got married in a one room apartment and it ‘made sense’. Remember anyone who is not willing to sign that marriage contract doesn't know talk more of valuing your worth. The same way Etisalat despised Saka despite the mileage his adverts had generated for them, is the same way your partner would despise you if you have had two children for him, stay in his house yet, he is yet to pay your bride price!

So before you get into such situation, my dear reader, kindly PORT TO A BETTER NETWORK!

Finally, once you see a guy that signs that deal, I beg you in the name of God, give it your best! From the advert, you can see how ‘Saka’ danced a 20million naira dance once he ported. He never danced in such a way for Etisalat (only screaming a hungry man’s scream of ‘awoof’!). Once that guy/lady puts pen to paper, give him/her the best of you because he/she deserves it.

PLS NOTE: To all my readers, better value me now before I port o! Are you satisfied with your partner or do you intend to port like saka? 

Originally by @stephenakintayo. Re-written by @FemiBellos.