I Slept With a Harlot!

I dropped her off with my car and raced back home to prepare for church (to think that I even had the guts to want to go to church after a night of fornicating!). 

The night before was an eventful one as I had a company function to attend at one of the popular hotels in Abuja. At about 9pm when the function ended, I was driving out of the hotel when I saw this beautiful lady standing as if waiting for her driver, or a cab. I slowed down and hunked, 'where are you headed I asked' and she said 'it depends'. Hearing that, for the wrongest and weirdest reasons, maybe just to see what came out of it, I decided to play along and into my car she hopped. 

Skip to the following morning, with all the guilt flowing in me, I summoned courage to dress for church. I drove at 50km/h wondering what it was I was going to do in church, lift up hands that had done ungodly things the night before or? In all of this, one thing was sure, I was going to my father's house or should I be headed for a beer palour instead? That wouldn't possibly help! All I needed right now was a fix, not a quick fix like clubbing, drugs, sex or alcohol rather, I needed a REAL fix. 

Seated right at the back where I was cos I came in late (which was good as I couldn't stand seating in front), there was this mixed smell of the lady from the night before and the cologne which I wore. Despite my 1 hour in the bath tub that morning and the N1,200 soap I use to bath, the smell of filth, that vile smell, the smell of an harlot lay underneath! I immediately raced to my car (as someone with an asthma attack would reach for his inhaler) and picked the body spray I permanently kept in the car and 'bathed' myself with it. Respite came my way for a few minutes as the smell seemed to disappear under the now over-bearing body spray alas, it was only for a moment! 

Then it struck me, no matter how I tried to cover my sinfulness with anything from denial to church work and even more sinfulness, the stench, filth and consequence of sin would always seep from beneath. Sin sticks its logo, emblem or insignia on you and just as the famous song writer wrote '...what can wash away my sin? NOTHING but the blood of Jesus!'. In Isaiah, God said, '...though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red as crimson, they shall be white as wool'. Just then on my knees, with tears rolling down my eyes, in the midst of my feeling of guilt, rejection and dejection, I felt an outpouring of his love which enveloped my heart. From the coldness and heaviness of heart which I felt, I felt this uplifting warmth which wrapped round my heart. 

I may have slept with an harlot, I might even be the child of an harlot, I may be a 'runs-girl' or even, a yahoo boy! I might even be the type that visits elegushi beach on those saturday nights that my wife isn't around or I may be the girl with a target to meet that yields to customers t to meet that target. I may be worse than all of these yet, IN THE ARMS OF HIS LOVE I FIND REST! 

Selah. 

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Lessons From A Lagos Bus Conductor

What could I possibly learn from a tout - an uneducated, violence-prone, abusive, dirty and unkempt person as a bus conductor, especially the ones in Lagos? The above is a near-description to what you have running through your mind upon reading the title of this piece. So many times we are clouded by sentiments, prejudice and biases so great and so little, we fail to learn even from the smallest of things (ants) expecting our lessons to come from the most structured places (classrooms, trainings, seminars, conferences etc.).

After learning from one of Nigeria’s finest life coaches Steve Harris on Business lessons from hookers (#bizlessonsfromhookers) and after reading from my Bible Life lessons from ants (#lifefromants) I have drawn Lessons from Lagos bus conductors (#lessonsfromlagosconductor) which I will share with you and hope you draw inspiration from, sharing other lessons with us as well.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor the first thing noticeable about him is that he has a very strong, thick and coarse voice! Oh yes! That is what makes you know you are in Lagos. Your business must have a voice. He knows that the only way he can reach his customers is through that voice also, the best way he can withstand his competitors, union members and co. is by having that voice. Your business, brand or whatever it is must have a voice and you should know the appropriate channel through which to make this voice heard.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor another thing is his character. He has a strong character which is his major tool of oppression or resilience either on his passengers or on his fellow union members. It is this strong character that makes you readily comply with his demand for smaller denominations (money) with you once he says ‘do not enter without change’.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor the power of vision! Oh yes! (you must be laughing by now) He has vision else, how would he sight his passengers? He has his target, he doesn’t want the bus to move along empty therefore he must be quick to see opportunities (passengers) and communicate same to his driver when they get to that point to then maximize the opportunity. To excel, we must have the ability to recognize opportunities when they come our way and then maximize same and it is only when you have vision that you recognize an opportunity that is in tandem with the vision you have.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor he has negotiation skills. He is a good negotiator. When he mentions a price and it is inconvenient for the passenger, he negotiates with the passenger and based on the outcome of the negotiation, decides to either pick the passenger or let him be. His ability to negotiate well gets him a passenger or makes him lose one and so the success of any enterprise depends on how well you are able to negotiate for sole benefit or at worst, mutual benefit. Only those who are able to negotiate their way through life always get the best out of it.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor he has calculative skills! (laughs) yes, the same simple calculative skills that you probably struggle with. This one fundamental skill is required in his business in order to save him time amongst other things therefore, (assuming you gave him N200 for a N70 fare with an expected change back of N130) you then hear things like ‘do you have N20 there so I can give you N150?’ That is indeed simple calculation of addition and subtraction and he gets his problem solved in a jiffy. In other words, to be able to solve problems, you must have an analytical mind capable of solving problems that would otherwise have cost you time and resources by virtue of not being solved.

#lessonsfromlagosconductor he monitors the environment and assesses competition. The same bus that will delay you at a bus stop looking for passengers is the same one that will decide not to stop at a particular location, racing on to the next. I have observed that once he sees a bus going in same direction with his, he tells the driver to move on to the next stop preferring to get there first before this other bus gets there. 

#lessonsfromlagosconductor from the above, we also see that he has the power of foresight! You should be able to see what the market holds for your business or what the strides of your competitors are and race into the future before they get there so when the future eventually comes, you will not be stranded rather maximizing all the gains and value it has to offer. A perfect example is a company like Nikkon which continues to be relevant in the photography industry long after the demise of the film/dark room technology.

So, what lessons have you learnt from your everyday bus conductor which have gone unnoticed? Why not share them with us and let everyone draw inspiration from them!

Adios!

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