The Disguise of Opportunity

Timi had just closed from the office, tired and famished after a hard day’s job, he walked out of the office compound, bidding his colleagues that had their cars ‘see you tomorrow’. Strutting towards the bus stop from where he’d take the first vehicle before connecting the next, he reminisced on how he got this job READ IT HERE. 

The blaring horns aimed at another driver who didn’t notice the green light at the traffic junction brought him back to happenings around and looking up, he could only sigh at the crowd that waited at the bus stop, all waiting on tricycles, vehicles, buses, anything (moving that is) that could take them from this first point to where they’ll eventually connect to their destinations. The existing fuel scarcity in town didn’t help matters as this meant fewer vehicles were on the road.

Tiredly, Timi trudged towards the bus stop and took his place among the commuters with some, having that ‘I’ve been here for 30 minutes and counting’ look. Barely taking his place, a bus came along and because of the scarcity of vehicles, everyone paid no attention to order as they all broke and rushed towards the bus. How unlucky was tired Timi for as he made to enter the bus, someone else outsmarted him. 

“God, this was my best chance of getting a vehicle else I’ll have to wait for at least, thirty long minutes!” Timi thought to himself. At this time, even more people who had just closed from work tiredly walked towards the bus stop, filling every space available to stand. With despair of heart, Timi walked slowly back to the bus stop, back from where he had just chased the previous bus and while walking back, he saw this taxi slow down to drop someone and the taxi driver, not wanting a rush from the stranded commuters decided to move a little after the bus stop, dropping one of his passengers and swiftly, whilst others were trying to come in through the side where the passenger alighted, Timi quietly and comfortably entered through the other side of the car, an advantage he only had because he was coming from the opposite direction! Thankful to his stars, Timi enjoyed the ride and reminisced again on what had just transpired and it hit him; Many times in life we are faced with disappointments and we sometimes feel we’ve come to the end of the road. Truth is, without some of these disappointments, some of us may never attain that height, which we desire. Sometimes, you lose something smaller only to get a bigger and better of it. Whether you believe in God or in fate (life) of which life is from God, when things happen, always think of it as ‘it can only get better and never for worse’. 

Haven’t you wondered why after that break-up which you felt would bring the world to an end, you later met someone who is only better and unique in his/her own way and you wonder if you would have met this person if there wasn’t a break up with the previous? Ever wondered why after that deal went bad, it propelled you to do something bigger and even better? I once heard someone say it was when he was fired due to the banking industry restructuring many years ago that he was able to go after his passion and today, he is one of the household names in the Nigerian fashion industry. Every disappointment they say, is an opportunity in disguise!

BrideGroom indeed?!

On the wedding day or shortly before the wedding, the man is called the bridegroom and this is not without its reasons.

Take that word apart and it becomes pretty obvious; he's meant to be the bride-GROOM. That's not just a...ceremonial designation no, it's actually a job description. The job of the man is to 'groom' his woman. It subtly connotes an agriculture-inclined activity: to tend, to care for, to help improve, to supply essentials for growth and to bring out the best. The husband is not meant to bear the title 'bridegroom' just the wedding day (and night) alone rather, that is what/who he should be for the rest of his life! He should never stop tending, developing, nurturing and inspiring his bride to the fullness of her potentials.

So young Man, before you start 'delivering your manifesto', take a good look at your toolbox and ask yourself 'is my 'grooming kit' complete?"
"What exactly do I have to offer beyond material things?"
"Am I prepared to 'groom' this 'vine' or am I just craving its fruits?"

And my dear young lady, before you get carried away with whatever you're seeing or receiving, ask yourself: "does he have what it takes to help me become a BETTER PERSON?".
(Note the question: it's not just if he can give you better THINGS but if he can help you be a better PERSON).

What is his effect on your PERSON thus far? Are you becoming a better woman because of your association with him? Is there more clarity in your life? More discipline? More kindness? A better walk with God?

I once had a friend who during her birthday party, talked about how others had impacted her life and when she got to me, she couldn't place what impact I'd had on her. Silly as it may sound, it only left me with two options: I either cut off that friendship or start working towards being a positive influence on her.

Whatever the case, whether in a romantic relationship, a close or casual friendship, evaluate the influence ratio today and act in a fast but wise manner!!!

Follow me on twitter @FemiBellos and add me on BBM 2AE5A00E

The Business of Volunteering (Part 2)

The first part of this series highlighted the skills that one can acquire from volunteering via the real-life experience of a volunteer. However, it has come to my notice that not everyone knows all that volunteering entails and some of us may be misinformed about it so we would be discussing that here.

• Scene #1: Amina, 57 years old, spends two hours a day, three days a week, at a local school, helping to teach extra-moral (evening) classes.

• Scene #2: John, a 15 year old, goes roller skating at his estate park on a Saturday only to find that the park is a wreck. He could wait for the local cleaners to clean it up but instead texts some friends who show up with their boots and some garbage bags.

• Scene #3: Titi is a 43 year old lawyer who spends her days (and most evenings) as a partner at a high profile corporate law firm. One of her family's favorite weekend activities is gardening so they occasionally spend a Saturday afternoon at a community garden that provides fresh fruits and vegetables to local schools.

• Scene #4: Tanko is a 62 year old retired accountant. In addition to travel and other personal pursuits, he gives professional advice on the financial plans of a handful of nonprofit organizations. This is mostly done by email so he's found that he can get feedback to them whether he is at home or around the globe.

• Scene #5: Chinedu is a 24 year old recent University graduate who is in the process of looking for paid work in the nonprofit sector, preferably with an organization that focuses on public health. While he spends much of his time researching and applying for jobs, he also serves on the board of a local free clinic in Lagos.

From the above cases, we have an idea what volunteering is about. Common to all cases are; the people cut across different genders, ages and career stages. The time commitments range from impromptu to regularly scheduled work and it may include office-like work.

So volunteering means an interest, desire, or willingness to do good while contributing time, skills, and energy towards something that is not of direct benefit only to one's self, friends, or family and in the process, not expecting any sort of reimbursement or payment in return for one's efforts however with the option of choosing how, where, why, and when to get involved.

The United Nations has a volunteer programme called the United Nations Volunteers and has December 5 set aside every year for the International Volunteer Day. Volunteerism has evolved with society hence there are now virtual or online volunteers who can volunteer across the online space.

The many benefits of volunteering include meeting people whether for professional networking (in addition to making invaluable contacts, volunteering with a nonprofit is a great way to learn more about potentially working in the sector or a particular field), to make new friends, or to just understand a little more about others' ways of life. As stated in the previous post, volunteering also provides opportunities to gain new skills, practice existing skills in new ways, and learn more about complex issues like hunger, health care, and the environment especially when you volunteer for the United Nations and other international organizations. 

So, get online and look for the next comfortable volunteering opportunity next to you! You can start here!

[photo source: www.facebook.com]

Follow me on twitter @FemiBellos and add me on BBM 2AE5A00E